Goodbyes

Listen to the thunder in my heart.
Witness the rain fall from my eyes.
Smell the fear that I hold in my hands
after hearing you say your goodbyes.

From the moment when we first met
I knew my life would never be the same.
The tender touch of your hand on my face.
The way your voice whispered my name.

Memories like these will never cease.
Although, I will try and hide them away
Nightmares of that awful night when you left.
The night I begged you to stay.

Crying and crawling on the floor at your feet.
Hoping my pitiful state would keep you close.
Fighting and screaming with no understanding,
''Why, oh, Why is this happening to me!''

That last moment,
seeing your back facing me,
I'll never forget you not turning around.
My heart was in your hand as you walked away.
My spirit breaking being the only sound.

I close my eyes to listen for your steps to return.
Praying you will change your mind.
Be my lover, my friend, my soulmate forever.
Never another man like you will I find.

Seconds pass since you left my position.
Feeling like its been for many a week.
Will you ever come back home to me
or will it be another life that you seek.

Hours, Days, Months and Years may go by
but I will never forget how you smelled.
The spicey sweetness of your gentle skin
and your neck where my face once dwelled.

I have faith we will be together one day.
That day cannot come soon enough.
I never knew that losing the man I love
would make life so unbearably rough.

I stand strong, wise and vigilant
and others help me look for the day
when we will all be a spiritual family again
no matter what troubles come our way.

Til then, my love, I live and laugh
and hope one day I will wake up surprised
to find that we have gone fastforward through this lifetime
a time where there are no more goodbyes.

---A. Joleigh